If Fang Woke Up to Find All His Clothes Dyed Pink
by Dragonflychaser
Summary: I dub this story part of the little scenario series! Basically all the fics I write with the word if in the title. More crazy randomness, people.


**I do not own Maximum Ride.**

**A/N: A crazier story in the scenario series.**

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(Everyone is asleep in a hotel room. Then Fang wakes up.)

Fang: (sees pink clothes) AUGHHHHH!!!

Max: What? What? What's going on?

Angel: Huh?

Nudge: (snores)

Gazzy: Ahh! What happened?

Iggy: What's Fang yelling about?

Total: Sheesh, Fang. Shut up and let us sleep.

Fang: MY CLOTHES ARE ALL PINK!!!

Max: (gasps) Oh no! Fang could go into shock! I'll get you some non-pink clothes! (Runs to Fang's backpack)

Fang: (in terror) Hurry!!!

Max: Shoot! All the clothes in here are pink too! Even your underwear!

Fang: WAHHH! (Runs into bathroom to see if all the clothes he's wearing right now are pink)

Nudge: (finally wakes up) Huh? What? What's going on?

Fang: AHHH! EVEN THE UNDERWEAR I'M WEARING IS _PINK!_

Iggy: (snickers)

Max: (paranoid) You did it?! How could you?

Iggy: Huh? What are you talking about?

Max: (hysterical paranoid) Don't play innocent with me!

Gazzy: Ha, Iggy! (Points finger and laughs.)

Max: Oh, so you were in on it!

Fang: AUGH!!! THE PINK! IT _BURNS!!!_

Total: Max, get a grip.

Max: You too?! Who else? Nudge? Angel? WHO THE HECK AM I SUPPOSED TO TRUST?! (Runs around in circles screaming)

Fang: (pleading) Somebody please get me some clothes that aren't pink.

(Ari bursts into room.)

Ari: Ha! Everything went according to plan!

Angel: THE HECK?!!

Ari: Fang is about to pass out, Max is super paranoid, and Iggy, Gazzy, and Nudge are being chased around the room by Max! All because I dyed Fang's clothes pink!

Max: HOLD STILL SO I CAN HIT YOU GUYS WITH THIS BASEBALL BAT!!!

Iggy: Wait, I thought the narrator said you were running around in circles and screaming.

Nudge: Yeah.

Max: (pause) THE WHOLE WORLD HAS GONE INSANE!!! (Pause again) Oh well. I'll chase you traitors anyway.

(Run around room)

Gazzy: AUGH! FOR THE LAST TIME, WE DIDN'T DYE FANG'S CLOTHES PINK!

Max: Yeah, right! Hold still so I can hit you!

Angel: Uh, guys? Ari's in our hotel room. (They continue running) Fine, I'll take care of it myself.

Total: What about me?

Narrator/Script Person: Max is chasing you too.

Total: Oh. Okay. (Runs from angry paranoid Max.)

Angel: PREPARE TO GET YOUR BUTT KICKED, MORON!

Ari: (laughs hysterically) Yeah right.

Angel: You're going to punch yourself in the head. (Ari punches himself in the head.)

Ari: Owww.

Angel: This is no fun. I want a weapon. HEY NARRATOR PERSON, GIVE ME A RANDOM WEAPON THAT APPEARS OUT OF NOWHERE!

Narrator/Script Person: Here you go. Handle with care.

(Angel is given machine gun out of nowhere.)

Angel: Okay, it came out of nowhere, but it's not random.

Narrator/Script Person: If you don't want it, I'll take it back.

Angel: No thanks.

Narrator/Script Person: Oh, wait. You can't use that, you could kill Ari. That would be gore, and I'd have to give the fic a higher rating. Have a giant frozen chocolate bar.

Angel: Okay. (Proceeds to whack Ari around the head with giant frozen chocolate bar)

Ari: Ahhhh!!!

Fang: Somebody help me? Max?

Max: Oh my gosh! In my insane rage, I forgot that Fang could go into shock if I don't give him clothes that are black, or at least not pink! (Runs out of room to clothes store)

Iggy, Gazzy, Nudge, and Total: WE'RE SAVED!

Angel: SHUT UP AND HELP ME BEAT UP ARI!

Iggy: But _we're_ beat up. I have a broken arm.

Total: Don't look at me. I don't have opposable thumbs.

Gazzy: I'll help if the narrator gives me a rocket launcher.

Narrator/Script Person: NO WAY. Remember what happened the last time you and Iggy had a rocket launcher?

Gazzy: Darn.

Nudge: I'LL HELP, ANGEL! (Hits Ari upside head with crowbar)

Max: I'M BACK WITH ALL BLACK CLOTHES, FANG!

Fang: Hurry! I'm going into emo-shock!

(Hands clothes to Fang through door)

Fang: (happily) Yay...

Nudge: Hey, Ari disappeared in a big cloud of smoke, and when the smoke went away there was this pile of smiley face balloons. And a bomb. Can we keep them?

Max: NUDGE! THAT BOMB WILL GO OFF IN TWO SECONDS!

Nudge: Oh.

(Explosion)

Iggy: Oh, phew. It was a paint bomb.

Gazzy: How did you know it was paint?

Iggy: No idea.

Fang: AUGH!!! IT'S PINK PAINT! ALL MY CLOTHES ARE PINK AGAIN!!!

Max: Forget it. Buy your own clothes this time.

Nudge: Hey Max, can we eat the giant frozen chocolate bar the narrator person gave Angel?

Max: Sure, sweetie.

(Fang passes out from pinkness.)

Angel: NO! GET AWAY, YOU CAN'T HAVE IT! IT'S MINE! ALL MINE!!!

(Uses her giant frozen chocolate bar to knock out entire Flock, including herself)

Fang: Ow...

End.


End file.
